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User blog:LeandroDaVinci/The Walking Wiki: ERB Edition - Episode 1
(The camera follows a RV going slowly on the freeway) Terminator: Are you most excellent back there? (Bill opens a bag of chips and starts eating) Bill: Mr. White is sleeping, Ted looking through the window, and me? I’m chilling, dude. I need to delete all the blood that I saw off my head, dude. Socrates: What happened back there? Walter: Everyone that I knew...died…. (They all turn to see Walter) Walter: I was...I am...It is....I could’ve done something… Beethoven: I’m not trying to look like an asshole here but he’s right. (Socrates slaps Beethoven) Socrates: What the actual fuck, Ludwig?! He is traumatized right now! He needs support, not your insults! Beethoven: Just saying. (Beethoven puts his hand on Bill’s chips) Ted: Socrates is right, dude. He needs to cheer up, he needs some- Terminator: I am seeing something. (Beethoven goes to Terminator) Beethoven: Oh shit… (The RV suddenly stops aggressively, as they all go to see what happened) Ted: What happened, T-800 dude?! Terminator: Wait here. (Terminator takes his shotgun and goes outside, he is followed by Beethoven who carries a handgun) (Screen shows metal walls with 2 guards posted on top) Man 1: Hold it! Man 2: Come out of the vehicle with your hands up! Man 1: we are advised to shoot! (The guards see a tall man going out of the RV with a shotgun followed by an old man with a handgun) Beethoven: We don’t want any trouble! Terminator: and I will not put my hands up. (Terminator aims his shotgun at one of the guards) Man 2: the fuck is that thing? Man 1: shut it, Axel...this is your last warning! We have an army behind these walls and we will take you down! (Beethoven looks at Termy) Beethoven: I think that they’re dead serious. Terminator: I am a killing machine, Beethoven, I can take care of a complete army if it’s needed. Beethoven: I got a plan. Give up. (Beethoven drops his weapon and put his hands up) Man 1: good! Now your turn muscle man! (Terminator looks at Beethoven, whom nods as Terminator who puts his shotgun in the ground but not his arms up) Axel: oh fuck, they actually surrendered. Man 1: Axel, go get Barry, I'll keep watch here. Axel: alright. (Axel leaves to go get Barry) Max:...my names Max...hope you understand why we needed you to put those down. Beethoven: Don’t worry, the name’s Ludwig. Descendant from Germany if you’re curious. Terminator: I am- (Ted goes out of the RV as fast as he cans and screams) Ted: HIS NAME IS ARNOLD!...our uncle Arnold. Max: hold up! How many of you are there?! Beethoven: Six, if you count us. Max: I need everyone to exit the vehicle, do you have any more weapons? Beethoven: Just this shotgun and two handguns… Ted: Why do you need all of us outside, dude? We’re cool people. We don’t mean any harm to you, dudes. Max: I need to keep all of you in my sight while I'm alone, Axel and our leader should be back shortly. Ted: But- Beethoven: Yes, we understand, right Theodore? (Beethoven looks at Ted) Ted: Uhmm...yeah...yeah, dude! EVERYONE OUT! (Termy looks at Beethoven) Terminator: Are you sure about this, Ludwig? Beethoven: Just follow my lead, robot. (Bill and Socrates go out followed by a slow walking Walter White) Ted: This is everyone, dude. (Just then Axel and Barry appear at the top of the gate) Axel: Max, we’re back. Max: Sir Barry, a group of six arrived at the gate. Barry: are they armed? Max: they've dropped all their weapons, at least I hope. Barry: what do you think of them? Max: I only worry about one of them so far, the big guy, but they seem to be able to keep him calm so we don't need to worry for now. Axel: I'll keep an eye on them. Barry: my ass I'm letting you watch over these people alone. Max: me and Matt will do it. Barry: you! All of you! What's your names?! (Ted steps forward) Ted: My name is Theodore but you can call me Ted...this is… Bill: Bill, dude! Socrates: I’m… (Bill looks to Socrates) Socrates: I’m Grandpa. Beethoven: as I said earlier, the name’s Ludwig. (Ted pushes Walter) Walter: Oh, uhm, Walter Jackson… (Everyone looks at Terminator who keeps silence) Barry: I can see why you're worried about him. Max: his names Arnold...that's what they said before. Barry: I see, well, let me formally introduce myself. My name is Barry Sono, to my left is Max Falcon and to my right is Axel Chowman. Axel: sup. Barry: what you see before you is our community, we call ourselves The Usernames. Ted: You have the most excellent names I have ever heard, dudes! Bill: That’s damn right, dude! (Bill and Ted do air guitar) Barry:...um, thanks? Max: told you they were a tad odd. Barry: nevermind that...I want to ask you all some questions, I only need one person to answer, is that ok? Ted: Yeah, uhuhm, everyone alright with that, dudes? (They all nod except Terminator who only looks in a intimidating way to Barry) Ted: Ask, dude! Barry: very well then. How many people have you killed? Ted: Just one but it was because of mercy, the surfer dude was bitten. Barry: just one?...ok then...how long have you all known each other? Ted: We’re all family except Mr. Jackson dude. Barry: I see, next question, where were you going when you found us? Ted: To- (Terminator steps forward) Terminator: To the safest place possible, my mission is to keep them safe. Ted: Yeah...that, dudes. Axel: mission? Barry: well then, you couldn't of found a safer place to be...last question, do you want to come in? (Terminator gets closer to Barry) Terminator: Is it safe enough? Barry: not a single Zombie has ever gotten through these walls, living in here you wouldn't even know what was outside the walls, we have a few kids here who barely know what's happening, and we tend to keep it that way. Max: so are you guys in or out? Ted: Can I discuss it with my group, dude? Barry: just stay in our sight. Ted: Sure thing (They all come closer to talk) Terminator: They are weak. Socrates: How do you know? Terminator: Search mode. Ted: That’s a plus, dude. Beethoven: Let’s get in, what could go wrong? We have a damn robot with us. Walter: I kinda trust them. Bill: Yeah...Ted? Ted: So we are in, dudes? Bill: Hell yeah! Safety, dude! (Ted, Bill and Terminator do air guitar as they turn to Barry) Ted: We discussed, dude. Bill: and we want to get in, dude! Barry: great! Axel, open the doors, let's show our new guest around. Axel: got is boss. (The gate starts to opens as the group can now see inside The Username Base) (Screen shows a regular looking town with kids playing in the streets) Ted: Mr. Barry? We have a very important thing in the RV, can we enter it here, dude? Barry: how do I know that thing isn't rigged to explode? Ted: Look inside, dude, there’s only food and Mr. Jackson’s stuff. Bill: and the thing in the back is just a telephone booth! Get in if you want to, dude. Max:...something tells me they're not going to bomb us or harm us in any way Barry. Barry: that's what I was thinks...ok! You can bring in your RV! Max: just drive safely. Ted: Thanks a ton, dudes! Uhm, Uncle Arny, can you drive the RV inside please? Terminator: Sure. (The Terminator gets in the RV and starts to drive in) (Screen shows Barry, Max and Axel walking with the group) Walter: How did you make this place? This seems so unreal... Barry: we started building ever since this thing started, lost 19 men and 4 woman while making these walls, but I the end look what we've made. Max: a total of 83 people, 2 women are currently pregnant, including my wife. Walter: Congratulations, Max...I can’t imagine how is to be a father in this new world... Socrates: Imagine how the children will feel, Walter. Ted: And how do you feed your people, dudes? Barry: well we have several farms within the walls to grow fruit and vegetables, other than that we have constant supply runs in the area, with the addition that the abandoned Super Publix within 20 miles of here was almost completely full and only locked, no one ever tried to get in. Axel: translation, we grow and got super lucky. Beethoven: Finally some good food. I’m tired of chips. Barry: ha, you sound like my husband. Socrates: Husband? Does this mean that... Barry: is there a problem? Socrates: No, please! I’m just curious, I have never heard about man with man marriage. (Ted gets closer to Barry) Ted: He is just old, dude, he still lives in the past, forgive him. Barry: ahaha, it's fine, yes I'm gay, my husband, Matt works as both a guard and the “controller” of the farms. Walter: It’s nice to see new people and see smiles on their faces… Ted: Yeah, Mr. Jackson dude. (Termy leaves the RV as he sees Max getting closer) Max: hey Arnold, hold up. (Termy turns to Max) Max: we need to talk. Terminator: What is it? Max: I'm sure you're a good guy, but your attitude needs to change, I don’t need people being scared of some new 6 foot tall guy just because he refuses to act nice. Terminator: I do not know how to be nice, I was programed to- (Ted arrives) Ted: Max, dude, can we talk away from Uncle Arny? Max: yeah sure, if you need to. (They both start to talk as Terminator just stands there looking at people) Ted: Uncle Arny is mad, ok? Sometimes he thinks that he is a robot and stuff, dude, just follow his game, please. Max: are you joking. Ted: I wish, dude, he saw Aunt Sarah being eaten alive...and he got...you know, dude. Max:...fine, just make sure he doesn't start scaring any kids or anything, I'd hate to make him leave. (Just then another Man walks up to Max and Ted) Man 1: Max! Max: Jason, what is it? Jason: Barry said you and Matt were going to watch over the new guys? Max: he wants me now? Jason: that's what he said. Max: alright, Ted, can you and your uncle follow me? Ted: Yeah, dude! Uhm...Uncle Arny! Terminator: Yes, I will follow Max. Ted: Let’s go dude. (Max, Ted and Termy start to walk towards The Group) Jason: also if you see Axel, tell him to stop flirting with Dani, he's still on fucking watch! Max: got it. (Screen shows The Group along with Barry and Max) (Just then another Man walks up the group and kisses Barry) Matt: hey honey. Barry: you sure you're up for this? Matt: since when do I ever let you down? Barry: you have a point, ok, all of you I need your attention. (The Group all look at Barry) Barry: Matt and Max will walk you around to today, show you where everything is, show you what times we all eat, show you how everything works and then hopefully will find a job for you. Bill: We will have to wor- Ted: shhhh! Yes, sure, Mr. Barry dude! (Ted smiles at Barry) Socrates: Do the kids have classes? Matt: sort of, we aren't teaching heavy mathematics besides the usual adding, subtracting, you know. Max: it's mostly English. Almost normal History, Languages, stuff like that we don't find necessary. Socrates: I can teach them a little bit of Philosophy along with Bill, if you want to. Beethoven: I would like to do guard, I’m a good shooter. Barry: woah woah, calm down guys, we’ll talk about that later, for now I must go so I'll leave you in the hands of Matt and Max, I hope to see you all later. Ted: Thank you for everything, Mr. Barry dude. Bill: Yeah, you’re most excellent! (Bill and Ted put his arms up and their hands on their chests) Beethoven: By the way...where will we sleep? I don’t want to sleep in that stinky RV anymore. Matt: that's actually what we were going to discuss first, we have plenty of room for everyone here. Max: there's a few small storage units over there that we were able to turn into livable rooms, nothing special but 5 times as big as your RV, plus it's only 2 to a room. Matt: now, let's get started with the tour shall we? Ted: Sounds good to me, dude. (The camera starts to pan up to the sky as The Group starts to walk with Matt and Max) (The screen goes black) Category:Blog posts